11 Telltale Signs Your New Girlfriend May Be a Restraining Order Waiting to Happen
1. She looks into your eyes and says, "No one has ever made me feel quite the way you do." From across the ordering counter you respond, "Thanks. I'll have a venti machiatto, extra shot please."
(Photo by Kat Kirk).
2. While leaving the movie theater you hear someone shout, "150 yards Goddamnit! 150 yards!" To your surprise she screams back, "Inadvertent contact, Bill! Inadvertent!"
3. Before you’re even home from your first date, she's left four voice mails, sent two text messages and called your best friend to ask where you're at.
(Photo by Francisca Ulloa).
4. When she smiles there's always lipstick on her teeth.
5. Ten minutes after sex she's picking out baby names.
(Photo by Dyelbi).
6. The first time you meet her parents, you overhear her Dad mutter, "Poor bastard."
7. On your first date she tells her seven year old to call you Dad.
(Photo by Becky).
8. She threatens to beat your 66 year old secretary’s ass because she smiled at you.
9. She starts way too many sentences with, “My P.O. says…”
(Photo by Gisela Giardino).
10. She has twelve tattoos, eleven of them covering up old boyfriends' names...poorly.
11. Her bathroom reading materials include the books 'Schizophrenia and You: a Biblical Solution' and 'Women Who Beat the Men Who Love Them'.
(Photo by Claire).
[Thanks so much to the models/photographers, all who very graciously granted TheMishMash.com permission to use their work/likenesses.]
This is mega interesting about awesome
Posted by: Linsay | January 15, 2008 at 08:38 AM
Crazytime means keep away! - Eric Monse
Posted by: Eric Monse | January 15, 2008 at 01:33 PM
Women can be damn scary. Hilarious post, helped me get through the day! Can't stand women that are always threatening to fight.
Posted by: The World's Smartest Man | January 15, 2008 at 04:57 PM
While humorous, these have actually occurred -- One even applies to myself. Yeah, stay far away from the types mentioned above.
Posted by: Ronald Lewis | January 15, 2008 at 05:02 PM
Dated one of those once. Had to threaten to call JAG before she stopped calling me.
Posted by: Nathan V | January 15, 2008 at 05:02 PM
Great photos! Really love them.
Posted by: Sarah | January 15, 2008 at 05:10 PM
1 or 2 of those bring back unwelcome memories...
Posted by: chris | January 15, 2008 at 05:34 PM
WAIT. People on the internet have girlfriends?
Cheap joke, couldn't help myself.
Posted by: Brendan | January 15, 2008 at 06:08 PM
hahaha the pictures are great and your comments so FUNNY!!
Posted by: BlueTurtle | January 15, 2008 at 10:15 PM
this hits the spot man. All women have a thing about becoming mothers and naming kids. should have added one more point,
Photoshopping your pictures together to make pictures of your unborn children.
:P
N
Posted by: Nothingman | January 15, 2008 at 11:56 PM
Funny Link...
Posted by: Keith | January 16, 2008 at 12:23 AM
what's up with the one about the lipstick on her teeth? My gf does that...
Posted by: matt | January 16, 2008 at 12:50 AM
you forgot #12: She tries to administer a personality test claiming that L. Ron Hubbard is the messiah.
Posted by: John doe | January 16, 2008 at 09:24 AM
She's "down with the clown"...that's all sorts of trouble. juggalette=craziest gf ever.
Posted by: T | January 16, 2008 at 10:56 AM
As long as she's above the Vickie Mendoza diagonal on the crazy/hot scale.
Posted by: Hugh Jass | January 16, 2008 at 01:42 PM
Some women just go way to far...I didn't like the fact of my wallet sized photo being taped to the end of one of her "private" toys...thats just scary.
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Posted by: playah | January 17, 2008 at 06:53 PM