Who doesn't love the relationship honeymoon: you're happy, sex is great…all is right with the world.
(Photo by Emiliano).
Unfortunately, though, it doesn't last. To that end, then, you know the relationship honeymoon is over when:
1. You’re on the crapper and realize she’s standing next to you brushing her teeth, and neither of you care.
2. You’re regularly masturbating again.
3. She cuts her finger chopping onions and, without getting up, you simply say, “Boy, I know that hurt."
(Photo by Mike Colvin).
4. He knows you’re still awake but, regardless, flatulates…loudly and mutters, “Better."
5. Before fellatio you find yourself asking, "When did you shower last, honey?"
(Photo by Ian Forrester).
6. He gives you $40 to pick up dinner, and expects change.
7. She asks you to stop on the way home and pick up a gallon of milk, some Imodium AD and a box of Vagisil Anti-Itch Wipes.
8. You consider faking your death.
9. Now that you’re having regular sex, he refuses to see any movie he deems a chick-flick.
10. She’s just spent twenty minutes talking about white picket fences and baby names when you suddenly realize you have no idea what she’s been talking about and are amazed you've got to this point in the conversation without being discovered.
(Photo by BrotherMagneto).