Dopes

April 28, 2008

Some People Have No Business Sense

Baldwins_catering_and_pest_control
(Photo by kpe).

We're guessing Mr. Baldwin is not next in line for Season 6 of The Apprentice.

April 04, 2008

I is Stewpid

stu·pid  [stoo-pid, styoo-] –adjective
1.    lacking ordinary quickness and keenness of mind; dull.
2.    characterized by or proceeding from mental dullness; foolish; senseless: a stupid question.

Stupidity is of course right up our alley; and, as they say, "It takes one to know one." Hence:

1. Anna, here's a tip: go back and finish the 6th grade.

Les_prise
(Photo by py0tr3).

2. Why?

Close_gate
(Photo by aperrypic).

Continue reading "I is Stewpid" »

April 02, 2008

Every Neighborhood's Got One

We're all for freedom of speech but, just a guess, the following exercise thereof was probably not what the Founding Fathers had in mind.

Free_speech_2
(Photo by cheeseloaf).

Apparently the photographer's neighbor went a little haywire, which resulted in "a constantly escalating yard-art battle." The larger image is here.

March 30, 2008

Why Some People Shouldn't Be Allowed to Use Twitter

Twitter.com: "Twitter is a service for friends, family, and co–workers to communicate and stay connected through the exchange of quick, frequent answers to one simple question: What are you doing?"

User Dopeboyfresh, though, appears to be a perfect example of Twitter done wrong. To wit:

Dopeboyfresh_4

Yikes.

February 25, 2008

11 Neighbors from Hell

Thank god for zoning laws, covenants and deed restrictions.

1. So that's where the bodies are buried.

Signs_the_world_is_coming_to_an_end
(Photo by DistortedSmile).

The full-size image is even scarier.

2. Is it a pool or a baptistry?

Pink_jesus_pool
(Photo by Digital_Freak).

Continue reading "11 Neighbors from Hell" »

February 05, 2008

Religious Zealots Say the Darndest Things

They say...

1. That Hell is just beneath you, less than twenty miles away.

Hell
(Photo by Martin Sharman).

According to Pastor James Melton "the sphere of Hell is a round, hollowed-out place in the Earth's core...Scientists say that the Earth's outer crust is less than twenty miles thick, and that beyond that point, there [is] ... a lake of fire. [At] this very moment your eternal soul may be less than twenty miles from the burning fires of Hell!"

Pastor Melton's not alone. According to Dial-the-Truth Ministries, hell is unquestionably inside of the Earth. "The great pit [of] hell would only need to be about 100 miles or less in diameter to contain, with much room to spare, all the forty billion or so people who have ever lived, assuming their spiritual bodies are the same size as their physical bodies."

2. That the earth is stationary; the universe in fact orbits the Earth.

Earth
(Photo by NASA).

According to the Fair Education Foundation, the universe, "the stars, every 23 hours and 56 minutes...go around a stationary Earth."

The Association for Biblical Astronomy believes similarly.

Continue reading "Religious Zealots Say the Darndest Things" »

January 29, 2008

If You Only Had a Brain...

1. You'd have left the work truck at home.

Adultvideo
(Photo by Sara B. Jones).

2. You wouldn't have quit your day job.

Tudor
(Photo by Ikes).

Continue reading "If You Only Had a Brain..." »

January 19, 2008

You're an Intolerant Tool If...

1. You really think it's that simple.

Islam
(Photo by Abbyladybug).

2. You hawk pre-Civil War era garbage.

South
(Photo by Jacob Krejci).

Toothpaste
(Photo by Kaleidoscope).

The Darkie items are not museum pieces; they were actually marketed by the Colgate-Palmolive Company as recently as 1988.

Continue reading "You're an Intolerant Tool If..." »

December 12, 2007

"We're on a Mission from God...[the Rest of You Will Burn in Hell]"

All religions have those select few who, let's say, lack a sense of moderation. For example:

1. Good for one or two children's nightmares.

Real
(Photo by Itatton).

2. Abandon hope, all ye who enter here.

Burn
(Photo by Afroswede).

Continue reading ""We're on a Mission from God...[the Rest of You Will Burn in Hell]"" »

December 05, 2007

10 Bathroom Placards for the Uncommonly Stupid

1. I accept!

Defecate

(Photo by Kirsten Kirkpatrick).

2. Translation? "You! Out of the gene pool!"

Brush

(Photo by Henning Schürig).

Continue reading "10 Bathroom Placards for the Uncommonly Stupid" »

November 29, 2007

Thanks for the Tip

Roll

We're not sure who's dumber: the person who needs the hint or the dope who thinks such guidance is necessary.

 

November 26, 2007

9 Telltale Signs You're Probably an Asshole

1. You wildly overstate your case.

Overstate

2. You act as if the rules don't apply to you.

4x4

Continue reading "9 Telltale Signs You're Probably an Asshole" »

November 23, 2007

A Low-Cost, Effective Response to a Hateful Ignoramus

651554881_481049d371

The simple solution is oftentimes the most effective.

November 16, 2007

"You'll Shoot Your Eye Out."

Shooter

God, please, shoot both of my eyes out.

November 12, 2007

"Mamas, Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to be A$*h0les"

Waylon Jennings urged Moms not to let their babies grow up to be cowboys; we're more concerned though with those who grow up to be a$*h0les. This, then, is our ode to those who need to lighten up.

1. Your ass is like a so tight, you fart and only the dogs can hear it.

Yoyo

2. Someone should bloody his bottom.

Sign

Continue reading ""Mamas, Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to be A$*h0les"" »

November 09, 2007

Explain THIS Tattoo to Your Girlfriend

I'm at a loss for words:

Cat

(Note: Clicking the picture will take you to a larger-sized image that, not unexpectedly, is even more, how you say ... disturbing.)

November 04, 2007

Big Spender

Mcdonaldsdate

Guess who won't be getting lucky tonight?

October 30, 2007

Flunked (cont'd)

Fokyou

"Fok you you fokin' fok!"

October 24, 2007

And You Thought Pinhead From Hellraiser Looked Scary...

Scary

The whole 'White Pride' tattooed eyebrow thing is a bit unnerving also.

October 22, 2007

9 'Signs' You Need a Shrink

1. There's what in the where?!

Meat

2. "I'm going off the rails on a crazy train..."

Farts

Continue reading "9 'Signs' You Need a Shrink" »

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